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Monday, August 20, 2012

Love & Hip Hop Atlanta: Season FINALE Recap

As I sit here 20 minutes before the finale starts, I realize I'm gonna be sad now that the show is over. My Monday nights will not be the same. What else is there to watch? The Braxstons? I'll pass, for now. 

In case you missed the previous recaps, check em out below...
Episode 7
Episode 8
Episode 9

SHOWTIME!!!! 
8:01pm Scrappy stops by Erica's new crib. She got a new house and a new weave!! Oh yay! Erica says she thinks its best that the two of them remain friends and Scrappy agrees. He says he's willing to let it work if it works out that way. Translation: Buckeey's box sucks and he's ready to go back with the chick he calls "Baby mama." 

8:03pm Karlie randomly meets with Roscoe Dash in a purple room. Why did this song just pop into my head? Why is she tryna get with this kid who is playing rapper? What is he? Like TWELVE? Anyway, Karlie is a hoe and she doesn't have standards. Its clear she's tryna bang her way to the top, but if Roscoe Dash is your top you got bigger problems.  

8:05pm Mimi and Joseline are meeting with the therapist. Uh oh Stevie J just walked in. Stevie is wearing a shirt that says "I am God" and I just CAN'T deal. Mimi complains that Joseline and Stevie hang out at the skreh cluh too much and Joseline invited Mimi to join them. Oh, I love Joseline! Joseline dropped a bomb that she once watched Stevie have sex with her best friend in her bed. I'm not surprised. Also, Joseline tells Mimi she's been allowing Stevie to treat her the way he's been treating her because she stuck around for 15 years. Thats real life tho. Stevie says its his bus, implying that he's a meal ticket for both of 'em. He fuct that metaphor allllll the way up! He's gonna mess around and lose BOTH of his chicks! Elle-oh-Elle!  
::Commercial Break::
8:14pm Mimi & Ariane meet up. "Aren't you sick of this shit tho?" asks the friend with all the sense. Thank you Ariane for saying what all of us have been thinkin.  Mimi is wearing those UGLASS wedge sneakers. Thats why she can't keep her man. It appears Mimi sees things clearly. This is called foreshadowing ladies & gentlemen. Mimi says she has a cleaning company. You go girl. Mimi has a new attitude and I think she's about to really pack up and leave Stevie. 

8:17pm Shay and Scrappy meet up in the studio. Damnit she's wearing that horrible weave still. Scrappy reveals he's thinkin about goin back to Erica. Apparently Buckeey doesn't know the game. He wanted to smash her guilt free so he broke it off with Erica. DUH! Why is she surprised? She was on FLAVOR OF LOVE she should know better! They need to stop calling each other friends. Its clear they were more than that. Uh-oh she's crying. Her wig is still dry tho. If they were JUST friends she wouldn't be crying cuz he wants to get back with his ex. Just sayin...
8:20pm Stevie J stops by Benzino's whatever you wanna call it. So far, Zino's neck is still missing. Not sure if it plans to show up for the big moment at the end. Gotta stay tuned. Remember that Dinosaur show in today's earlier post? Those are Old Man Zino's kinfolks and he is a direct descendant of the baby dino. Zino confides in Stevie about the wild ways of the hoe he's planning to marry. Oh Zino! You've been in the game too long and your head is too big for you to NOT know the game. He's been a sucker since day UNO! I'm disappointed. 

::Commercial Break::

8:26pm Joseline and Steebie meet up at a restaurant. Joseline says she just wants peen and the money when she wants it. I can't be mad at her for turning the tables in her favor. But alllllll that black hair spray she has on her hair is UNcalledfor. I can't allow this to happen. Joseline needs to get her hair in order or I will forever shade her for it. Can't be calling yourself a "princess" with hair like a pauper. 

8:29pm KC 2.0 and Erica are furniture shopping. Erica just got a new crib and doesn't want to be house poor. KC 2.0 is thicka den a snicka. No rainbow. KC 2.0 done changed her hair again. Erica breaks the news that she is down with the swirl and she's been dating a (white) man. I don't know how I feel about that story since I heard Scrappy proposed to her at their reunion soooo ok. KC 2.0 shares the verbal altercation between her and Rasheeda and Erica is surprised by how it went down. I just realized we're 30 minutes in and we haven't seen Rasheeda. 

::Commercial Break::
8:37pm Stevie J called Joseline to the studio to meet his new artist. Her name is Shay Mack. Why is he doin the birdman handrub tho? Oh, he's tryna make Joseline jealous. Wassup with her teef doe? I bet if people asked her "What that mouf do?" She proly says "It shreds all your important documents baby." Ok that was mean. My teeth aren't perfect so I can't talk. He shoulda fixed her up before her debut. Joseline tells ol girl she can get a hit if she sucks his d*ck. Sounds true to me.

8:40pm KC 2.0 meets up with Rasheeda at a bar. 2.0 done changed her hair again. Rasheeda's face is beat to perfection honey! Yesss gawd!!! KC 2.0 says she's not going to accept how her ex has addressed the domestic violence issue. She's been going on for the entire season. I bet she stops strangers and finds a way to bring it up. I bet she finds a way to bring it up with all of her friends. Her friends are proly like, "Gworl whatchu doin fa yo birthday?" & KC 2.0 proly says, "Don't worry about my birthday! That man beat my ass!" *blank stare*

8:44pm Benzino and Karlie meet at the Sage Woodfire Tavern. This duck is about to propose! He's wearing a suit and tie giving speeches #andshit. Karlie is a hoe Benzino!!! Why is he giving her a ring? Karlie sees the ring and asks if he's ready. Who asks that?! Only a hoe would see an engagement ring and question whether he loves her. Karlie says she put Benzino on! ahahahahaahah!! She's delirious! What is she smoking? Whatever it is, its one hell of a drug! Benzino breaks off their "thing," but not before he loses all of his dignity and his neck is STILL missing.  

8:47pm Stevie J pops up to Mimi's job. Told y'all you can't trust men who "pop up" to your job. She's supervising while someone else is cleaning her client's house. It looks like the person who lives there doesn't know anything about being humble.  Mimi tells Stevie she shares responsibility for where they are because she's allowed it to happen. She tells Stevie she's not interested in continuing their relationship. I just realized Mimi has a skrong chin. I'm not judging. Just observing. Anyway, this can't be professional. If I were Mimi's client and I saw this on my security cameras (cuz w/a house like that you better have em) I would be furious! Why are your people coming in to my house? Stevie doesn't believe Mimi. I don't believe Mimi. Mimi doesn't believe Mimi. She's puttin on for the cameras so she can have something to go back and tell Ariane. Here he goes grabbing his peen again. Thats his source of power. 

::Commercial Break::
Looks like its time for the wrap up!
8:54pm Rasheeda and Kirk are renewing their vows. She looks beautiful. Looks like they're in the boondocks so I'm kinda waiting for a deer to just run up and join the party tho. Rasheeda still wants to be mainstream. Just when I thought she had her head on straight she goes and proves me wrong. 

Karlie is in the studio with Roscoe Dash. She's all over him just like the smut she is. That poor kid. I hope he straps up. 

KC 2.0 is at a photoshoot professing she's "an open book but not a clean slate." I hope if they get a second season she finds another topic to discuss and a hairstyle she can wear for more than 2 minutes. 

Erica is putting the finishing touches on her new home. Its still pretty empty, but kudos to her for getting her own. 
Scrappy and his daughter are at Momma Dee's crib tasting food. Scrap ends his final appearance on season 1 by saying, "With yo face ass." Not sure what that meant. 

Joseline was a strippa a few months ago. Now, she's going around calling herself "The Puerto Rican Princess" and she's on her way to the top. She's here to stay she says. Good luck with that gworl. 

Steebie J's new "artist" is showing off her tats. He just smelled her arm. What kinda creepy sh*t is that?! Good gracious he's already got a new one to simp out with. 

Mimi and the daughter Stevie gave her are at the aquarium. Stevie has three daughters? Learn somethin new everyday. Not that I care. 

The season ends with Stevie's "artist" analyzing his back tats. We all know how thats gonna end. 

Well there ya have it folks! The season is over. Part 1 of the reunion airs on Monday August 27 & I'll be watching! 

Oh, look Single Ladies *changes channel* 

Twitter: @LegallyRatchet1
Email: TalentedGeneration@gmail.com

4 comments:

Real Miss Dread said...

Enjoyed the post!

Rickeysha said...

Thanks for reading!!

Bri said...

Awesome job Rickeysha!

Girl I can't wait for the reunion - admittedly I want to see how #ratchet that's gonna be too. Also (djm) I grew some 'like' for JoJo in these last couple of episodes. And damn Steve for his strong ass genes that lil girl look JUST like him....

Rickeysha said...

Joseline grew on me too!!!! At first I was like "This heffa needs to learn to speaka the GD English," but by last night's episode she was my second favorite person on the show (Ariane is my favorite). I wanna know if they're gonna get a second season, and if so will Benzino's neck make a guest appearance? LOL!

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