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Tuesday, October 09, 2012

5 Reasons I Blame Single Women For Today's Dating Scene

When it comes to dating, single women are our own worst enemy. You mad? 

A few years ago while driving up for a ski trip, I asked a great friend of mine what was special about his current girlfriend. That's not to say I didn't think she was beautiful inside & out, but in a city like DC  every other woman fits that description. Everyone here has degreeS<---notice this is plural. Everyone here is smart & funny & beautiful & great in bed & a good cook & a tolerable asshole. I wanted to know what helped her stand out. It was clear to me that he was waiting for the perfect time to propose (and they recently got married). 

My friend has always been brutally honest with me. Because of that, I chose to use his perspective as my inspiration for writing this. Essentially, he told me he knew she was special because she held him to a higher standard than the other women. He had women willing to give themselves to him without expectations for anything in return. Deep down he wanted more. He was willing to wait for her. She made him want to be a better man even when he knew he wasn't sh*t. 
That is some powerful sh*t. 
I need y'all to go read that line again. 

I already know what you're thinking: I should spend my time uplifting women & blah blah blah. 
Think til you're blue in the face. 
I'm not bashing women. 
I'm not talking down on women.
I'm not here to pretend certain things don't need to be said.
I can say these things because I am dealing the monsters single women have allowed to be fruitful and multiply.
If you can't handle the truth, I suggest you stop reading NOW. 

Women with standards are under attack. 
*blank stare* 
That's not to say that women should not have standards. By all means, put your pussy on a pedestal. Just saying women with standards are being treated like a problem because women with standards are no longer the norm. SEVERAL men are currently building their careers based on their ability to give single women common sense advice about dating. The men and the advice they give are a problem.

Well ladies, we asked for independence and we got it. We also got ass shots, blonde lacefronts, colored contacts and men who like dumb women. Take the good with the bad. Women are paying for dates AND giving it up on the first time going out. We're outchea losing and it's like we don't even care. I'm concerned. Are your degrees keeping you warm at night? The dating scene seems to be getting worse and it's somebody's fault. 
Let's play the blame game.
After a bit of reflection, I came to the conclusion that single women are to blame. It's our own fault we're dealin with slim pickings. We still get to decide when the relationship goes to the next level. We only fall for what we WANT to fall for. Sure he may be handsome & charming, but we still have the last say so in how far he goes. You could send his handsome & charming ass home with blue balls. Before you throw a hissy fit, I'm not saying men shouldn't be held accountable. We could delve into a discussion on single mothers and the number of households without father figures, but not today. I *AM* saying I think it's time single women are held accountable for their role. Men don't have game like we let them think they do. 
Here are 5 Reasons Single Women are Responsible For Today's Dating Scene: 
5. Good Girls Wanna be Bad. "Good" girls have allowed one fuct up relationship to ruin them. Now they want every guy after him to suffer. Either that or they wanna be the cool girlfriend who is ok with him cheating, not using condoms and expecting coochie AND a BJ on the first date. Instead of being who they are, they're being who they think men want them to be. Making us all look bad. 

4. Bad Girls Pretending to Be Good. Nothin worse than a hoe pretending to be everything BUT a the hoe she is. She's just tryna fool somebody into wifin her. I'm not mad cuz that's the game we're all playing. She's giving good girls a bad name, tho. Beware of the fake classy chicks. Keep ya eyes on the chicks who lack self-awareness. They can't be trusted. 

3. Nice Guys STILL Finish Last. Nice guys have gotten tired of finishing last. The nice guys have become assholes because the assholes are getting all of the attention. They got tired of not gettin ass while sittin on the sidelines watchin low-life guys win. Now we have a league of ordinary assholes who managed to attract extraordinary women.

2. "Playas" STILL Winning. Back in the days it wasn't cool to be a player; now, there are women who will accept a man who tells them he's taken. I'm serious. I've heard it with my own ears! What happens if he has a girlfriend and he tells you about her, but you still agree to deal with him? He wins. Further, other men see it working and they imitate it. We have a nation full of voluntary & informed sidechicks. They say they can get their own man because it sounds good, but they don't believe it. *THAT* is a problem.

1. Lower standards. This is the biggest setback of them all. Some women have forgotten that power is in the P.U.S.S.Y. Chicks be giving up the cow AND the milk for free. Women need to remember everything straight men do, they do it to attract women. They wouldn't want that car, or job or apartment/house if it wouldn't get them the poon. They deny it, but it's true. Folks giving into the pressure because they're afraid to be alone. 

Feel free to put your pussy on a pedestal. Raine won't judge. It all boils down to learning to love yourself and having high self-esteem. Stop looking for a man who doesn't give a damn about you to validate you. Then again, what do I know? I'm single. I'm childless. I'm a Scorpio. I don't be knowin.

So whadya think? Are single women really to blame? Will we ever stop sayin "Men aint sh*t?" Who in the hell left the gate open?

Twitter: @LegallyRatchet1


Candice said...

I think people remain single (mostly in larger, high Black population cities) is because they try to date out of their leagues. Men and women, know your lane if you're trying to get a band. Girl, if you are a seven, that sixes want to wife you up now. The sevens are willing after a courting period. The eights are might have to pull out a few surprises, but they are open to it. The nines and tens ain't for you.

That said, I didn't have the highest of standards throughout my dating life, if we are defining them by how much cow and milk we were offering. But, I've been engaged twice (dudes stay trying to wife me), and I will be married in June. I attribute it to a lot of things to be found here:

But, I also stayed in my lane. LOL!

Rickeysha said...

Thanks for reading & for your continued support! I have to agree with you on this one. A lot of issues stem from people trying to date UP. I don't blame em! You just gotta know how far UP you can go. If you end up going too far up, that is when you end up in trouble.

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